The Rules are Not Black and White.

I had a question yesterday on how much white is permissible for a wedding/wedding shower/etc when you are not the bride.

Rules have changed. People are wearing white whether it's pre or post Labor day if they want to or not. But what happened to placing the bride above yourself?

I think another valid question is how much black is permissible as well! When I was growing up, my mom never allowed us to wear black to a wedding. Now people are doing it all the time.. I think it is important to break it up with some color so that you don't look like you're attending a funeral.

Here the girls from SATC are attending a funeral...so their black frocks are valid.

I wanted to post this for fun...Scarlet O'Hara wore black when she was in mourning for her husband while attending a party. She was dressed appropriately, yes, but she earned the evil stares for dancing while she was supposed to be in mourning.

Here is an inspiration board mixing black, white, and green...completely acceptable choices of wedding attire. Mixing patterns and prints with black/white will not earn you blaming looks.

Peggy Post of the Emily Post institute says you can wear white, as long as it doesn't look remotely bridal. Wearing something with white in it is also fine, and it should never compete with the bride's white. I am siding with some of the more traditional writers here...don't wear white, ivory, or other very pale colors. Another color to avoid? Red! Red is not remotely a bridal/wedding color and is a major attention grabber. Keep the attention on the bride and off your dance moves.

Yes, Audrey, you are most often the epitome of style and grace, but please do not attend a wedding inspired by this outfit...Or with "tada!!!" arms while coming down the stairs...the bride may ninja kick you out.

To sum it up? Let's be honest, brides are fragile creatures. Best not to mess with her emotions and wear all black or all white. Even to showers I feel awkward if I wear all white...I've worn a white cotton dress but kept my yellow cardigan on the entire time. Some brides like to wear all white to each party/event pertaining to the big day.